Working in a hospital has taught me so much about coming in and out of crisis mode and how to take good care of our precious minds and bodies. As health care workers, we see all of it. Death and dying, visually difficult things in emergency situations and many people crumbling to the floor in devastation about their loved ones. We see it, we take it in and we can go into crisis mode on a regular basis. The situations in which we are part of make us vulnerable to being in crisis and perhaps even staying in emotional, physical, mental distress for several hours to days.
What am I referring to when I say crisis mode? Crisis mode is when we are not operating from our pre-frontal cortex, we are driven by emotional states and we may make poor decisions to try and soothe the strong emotions and physical state. We don’t feel in control in crisis, we feel overwhelmed and sometimes overcome with worry thoughts. Being in crisis because of things that happen at work sucks because it has a big impact on our personal lives. This is something that health care workers experience and without a plan of action about how to manage the crises that come up, it can overtake our lives. Working long hours and dealing with painful things is only half the battle for health care workers.
It is really important for us to understand when we are experiencing a crisis. Without this recognition, we have no ability to respond. Some signs that we are in crisis:
Emotions: experiencing strong emotions that don’t match the situation, can’t stop crying, feeling like emotions are all over the place, feeling overwhelmed easily
Physical: heart racing, stomach upset, exhaustion, sleep issues
Mental: overthinking a situation, disorganized thoughts, victim mentality, inability to problem solve
Once you recognize that you are in crisis, you can make a decision about what would help. Sometimes distraction can get us out of the state but sometimes it just helps us avoid for a little while but it is still there. Doing things that truly bring you back to ground level is key. What are those things? Truthfully, the list varies from person to person. What works for me may not work for you and vice versa. Typical things you might hear about are exercise, being with a supportive person, being outdoors, taking a bath, calling a friend. These are just a few and I won’t go on and on. Why don’t we do those types of things when we are in crisis? Why do we go for the chocolate, the couch and Netflix? Why might we yell at our husband and kids instead of removing ourselves and spending a few minutes alone? What I have learned from personal experience and others is that sometimes we don’t want to do the things that are good for us. This makes sense because we aren’t thinking straight, we have lost access to the part of our brain that would help us make better decisions. In the end, it makes us feel even worse because we have over consumed and we feel terrible.
There comes a point when you may be forced to make a decision. You make a decision about how you will deal with crisis situations when you are not in crisis. and you can be more mindful about what you actually need. You accept that if you are a doctor or a nurse, you will be personally impacted by your work and you will experience this phenomenon on a regular basis. Here is one pathway for trying to come up with a plan:
Step 1. Accept that my work will deeply impact me at times and I may go into crisis mode.
Step 2. What do I need when I am in crisis? Make a list, write it out. You will see that it will not likely include a costco size chocolate bar.
Step 3. Put the list up somewhere or keep it on your phone.
Step 4. when crisis arises, refer to the list and do the things on the list. Opposite to what you would normally do.
The do the opposite of what we normally do is hard! We automatically gravitate to our usual. But ask yourself, is the usual response helping me or harming me?
Here’s the thing. We expect too much of ourselves and we fail over and over because our expectations are too high. We cannot make good choices when we are feeling so crappy that we can’t even think properly anymore. We have to know what to do before being in the situation. It takes some thought to cultivate a list and test it out. But it is absolutely worth the effort if you are interested in no longer being driven by emotions. And if you are interested in no longer moving from crisis to poor decisions to regret. My last thought – be good to you. Don’t put yourself on the bottom of your priority list all the time. Take care of you and show compassion for all that you do and see on any given day at work.